IS VIRGINITY BROKEN ONLY ONCE IN LIFE TIME? BY REV FR PAUL IKECHUKWU OGUJIOFFOR

As children of God, as Christians and as human persons too who may tend to say “I don’t care I must live my life the way I want it”, whether we want to know or not, the fact is that we are under control of Him who created us out of his bounty and goodness. This implies that we are not free to do whatever we think or wish personally to do and cannot pretend not to know what is right at a point a time, irrespective of our knowledge, rhetoric or what we may think as being “rightful thing” to do at a point in time. Therefore, the issue of virginity preservation before Sacramental marriage as a Christian is always a judge against us once we go contrary, that is testing if you are a virgin really through sexual intercourse, before that particular day of Covenant promise or oath or vow between a man and a woman as to be husband and wife in the Church. This is spiritually and morally binding of both couple before Christ’s faithful and once is done the consummation follows immediately at home or any place they have prepared on that particular day. Therefore, once a woman is not raped or by any other means available be it by physical force or drugged as to have carnal relationship or knowledge of her, the breaking of her virginity is always consciously and conscientiously done by her deliberate intention. Virginity is physically broken (by sexual intercourse or any form of accident) only once in life time. It is always the girl or woman who consents and opens herself deliberately for the passage of a man in her. For one to say that, they (the man or boy or his people or yours) made her to lose her virginity before the wedding day in the Church as she promised her God is totally false and porous of her personal conviction of Faith in God and moral steadiness as a person (man or woman). In the world today there are many places we can go for medical certification prior to Sacrament of Marriage, from a very Christian and reliable faithful medical personnel, therefore, we need not fear or have any doubt about what God can do. Ever before both of you get involved or enter deep into the relationship which is likely to lead to marriage this test ought to be done and certified okay. Trying to make a test (by having sexual intercourse), by both partners and one of them is a total lack of faith and trust in God as a Christian. For one (girls mostly) to say that “I am forced or under duress” is simply a lack of faith in God and lack of trust of yourself too as a person, hence a spiritual laxity. Wherever the seemingly persuasion as may claim by either partner is coming from, is a total lack of faith as a Christian, for even when they made test of themselves through sexual relationship or intercourse, if God is to say otherwise because of their action, they will end up being an atheist when nothing happens within their marriage, even when both are sexually fit as they think of themselves after prior meetings. Be it as it may, the defensive statement from the girl, that he made me to lose my virginity before the Sacrament of Matrimony is totally from her own feeble mindedness or personal sexual nostalgia weakness, for she gave the opportunity to be so, by leaving herself totally free without anything while alone with the supposed man, thereby allowing him to explore her body and she loses her virginity (cfr. Ezek.23:3.8-10.21; see also 16:15; Sirach 23:16-17). We ought to know that the body chemistry is very volatile once it comes to carnal rapport, that is why when the opposite sex works on the body of the either persons he or she gives in immediately, therefore, to avoid blame to anybody, is always best not to give the devil a chance (cfr.1Pet.5:8-9). Once we are baptized, our Christian faith teaches, that the body exploration or foreplay between a man and a woman is only allowed or permitted for those who are already wedded in the Church (cfr. 1Cor.7:1-16) and not even when they were still in Marriage Course. Therefore, Continence or Self Control is always the solution and this is upheld through avoiding the occasions of sin regarding the loss of integrity and dignity as a Christian and more so as a person. Regrettably these days during Sacrament of Matrimony in the Church very many yet after their continuous carnal knowledge come up with an immaculate veil on the day of marriage with the face covered as to have a ceremonial unveiling of the seemingly nubile, alma or virgin, this a spiritual cum moral caricature to God of virginity in the Liturgy. This is spiritually hypocrisy and a debased faith unto Virginity and Immaculate nature. Therefore, let us try always to maintain our faith, trust and promise to God, more so when we have paraded ourselves in the past as being virgin before marriage, if not let us not make caricature of ourselves before God. All these are also applicable to friendship relationships between a boy and a girl or a man and a woman. If you are a virgin and then contacted a relationship with a boy or a girl as a friend try your best to make the friendship sincere and firm with your state of virginity with steady integrity and original dignity. If he or she wants to know whether you are a virgin really, you don’t need to give in to his or her persuasions by saying have me and see that am saying the truth, it is a form of gross stupidity on your part as a boy or a girl, for you can never regain your original status when you are a virgin once you have carnal relationship with an opposite sex, no matter many years it takes you to have it the second time. Be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and put on the new self Eph.4:23-24. Oh God, have mercy on me Ps.51.

Written on Thursday 12th September 2013 Memorial of the Most Holy Name of the Blessed Virgin Mary while in MONASTERO BENEDETTINO S.MARIA DE' FRANCONI VEROLI-DIOCESI DI FROSINONE-VEROLI-FERENTINO.